on reaching the finish line

I am rarely speechless. As I entered the Joyce Center at the University of Notre Dame on graduation day, wearing unflattering (yet fully recyclable) academic regalia and walking in line with a group of the best people I've ever met, I don't think I could have put into words what I was feeling. When my name was called, magna cum laude, and I walked across the stage to pick up the most expensive and hardest-earned piece of paper I own, my mind was racing with thoughts of "holy crap this is awesome" and "try not to have a double-chin in these pictures" and "please, for the love of Mary, don't fall down the stairs." And after our degrees were conferred, as we stood with arms around each other to sing the alma mater, Notre Dame, Our Mother, all I wanted to do was cry and laugh, because it was over and we actually did it. And through it all, I don't know if I could have said anything out loud other than a simple, "wow." Even now, with a week as a Notre Dame alum under my belt, I still don't know if I can fully put into words what it has meant to me to be part of this program... but I'm going to try.

This experience is a life dream fulfilled. I'm not sure how many people can say that they have been able to achieve their dreams. After all, even though they may have some grounding in reality, unlike fully attainable goals most of our dreams are pretty unrealistic. I have dreamed of being a Broadway star, living in the French countryside, and falling in love with a clone of Dave Grohl. And for much of my adolescent life, I dreamed of being able to go to a school the caliber of Notre Dame. I had the grades but lacked the finances coming out of high school. Don't get me wrong - I had a great college experience and was part of a very good master's program at a state school, but there has always been something inside of me that wanted to test myself through the learning experience at an elite university. I suppose it could have been any one of many elite universities in this country, but Notre Dame has always held the most special of places in my heart. It simply feels different than any place I've ever been. So while many girls grow up imagining their weddings and husbands and babies, I imagined what it would be like to say I graduated from Notre Dame. Well, let me tell you, it's freaking awesome. But rather than wanting to shout it from the rooftops, I feel honored and humbled more than anything else. I look forward to hanging this diploma on my wall, but I also know how hard I had to work for it - and how hard I will have to continue to work to feel worthy of it (and, well, to pay for it...). In the end, I suppose that's true of any dream fulfilled.

I continue to be amazed by the love, support, and encouragement of my family and friends and co-workers. It is a gift to have people in my life that inspire me to work hard and try to do my best. I realize now more than ever that rarely is success achieved without help from others. They may not do the work for you or even provide the funding for it, but they do countless other small things that make it possible for you to reach your goals. The people in my life said prayers for me, gave me words of advice and encouragement, listened to me when I was stressed out, bought me drinks and shared meals with me, and gave me the support to be away from work and home so that I could spend two summers on campus. This is truly a gift.

I knew I would have a great academic experience, but I didn't expect to meet so many people who care so deeply about their work and the success of the students in this program. From the faculty and staff to my classmates, I don't think I encountered a single person who didn't want us to learn and do well. Some professors weren't quite as successful as others at making their subjects relevant for the nonprofit world - and some were certainly challenging in other less positive ways - but there is something to be said for anyone who invests their time in this program. And some of our professors gave so much more than I could have imagined... because it wasn't just important for us to learn their subject but to use it to make ourselves and our organizations better. The staff of this program simply created a family away from home for us. Never have I seen quicker response to questions and concerns, and they made sure we had everything we needed to be successful - from information to support to a steady stream of coffee breaks just when we needed them. I've already gushed about my classmates, so I'll just say one thing about them - they are just some of the best people I've ever met, and I'm so grateful that I got to share this with them. I will continue to cheer for their success and look forward to seeing the rest of my cohort cross that stage over the next couple of years.

Time will tell what else I may be able to accomplish and share with others as the result of this experience. But for now, it feels pretty amazing to be Irish.

the end of the road

*cue BoyzIImen music*

As of noon today, I have submitted all parts and pieces of the field project, my last remaining requirement for the MNA degree. I was fortunate to receive a promotion last summer that allowed me to take on new responsibilities for marketing and communication planning, and I've spent almost this entire year doing research and keeping records, making charts and reading about best practices, going to meetings and talking about graphic design and core messages... all in service of developing a new marketing plan. For me, this project really was not only the culmination of what I've (hopefully) learned at Notre Dame but also the representation of my first year in a new position. This project, while time-consuming and often seemingly insurmountable, has taught me so much. I guess I can really say that about the whole degree. I went in not really knowing what would be next for me, and now I have a much clearer picture of where I think I want to go from here. Time will tell, but it's all pretty exciting. I'm ignoring the fact that I now have thousands of dollars of new debt. It'll be worth it. I can get football tickets for face value now. :)

It seems impossible to imagine that this time two years ago, I was apprehensively buying books, school supplies, and glamorous items like shower caddies and extra-long twin bed sheets in preparation for my first summer at Notre Dame. It's even more impossible to believe that it has already been two years. Two whole years. While at times it felt like we may never actually reach the point of being finished, this program has flown by. Maybe it's a function of being older - the days and weeks and months feel shorter and shorter... or maybe it's a function of the program design - the summer sessions allow 11 weeks of your life to disappear while you live in a little bubble in northern Indiana... or maybe it's just that whole thing about time flying when you're having fun. I've probably worked harder for this degree than for anything else I've ever accomplished (except for that physics for science majors class I took as an undergrad... majoring in music), but man. We had some fun.

I still can't say enough about these beautiful people that I call my classmates, colleagues, and friends. They make me incredibly grateful for social media. Though time and distance separate us, we can still ask for advice or vent frustrations through a snarky conversation in our facebook group, share funny kid/pet/life posts on instagram, or send completely unflattering double-chin pictures through snapchat. I am grateful for so many things in my life, but few compare to the Notre Dame experience. In just a few short weeks, I'll be back on my beloved campus, dressed in a cap and gown made of recycled plastic, and ready to walk across that stage. I'll try not to mess it up. :)